I just looked at the calendar and discovered it’s been almost 5 months.  5 MONTHS since I last published an installment of The Celluloid Files.

You have my deepest apologies, dear readers.

My original goal was to write enough and publish it weekly so that we could have a whole story before us by the middle of July.  Obviously, that’s not going to happen.

I’ve been struggling with a pretty phenomenal case of writer’s block.  This particular block involves a lot of stress and worry over finances (the sort that ends with crossing all major body parts under the covers at night and whispering into the darkness, “Please let us be able to pay rent this month,” over and over again).  Part of this comes with the territory, of course – we chose, early in our marriage, to follow my writing dream instead of financial security (how I feel about that choice now, nearly a decade later, is a post of its own).  We’ve never expected to have a surplus of greenbacks rolling around in even the smallest of backyard money bins.  We’ve made sacrifices we didn’t think about having to make, and survived…and we’re okay with that.  But there eventually comes a point where we sit back, take a look at our bigger picture, and, well, totally freak out.

From a writer’s perspective, that means I’m forced to take a hard look at my projects, my goals, my intentions, and my trajectory.  What was supposed to be three novellas released a year ago was actually one novella published six months ago.  By now, I aimed to have a successful Kickstarter under my belt and be two weeks away from the release of my first novel.  Instead, I discovered the book – nay, the entire series concept – needed a return to the drawing board.  My writing time slowly eroded beneath the sharp winds of job hunting and other serious life concerns.

Life, man.

So where does that leave Celluloid Files?

I’m sad to say that as much as I love the idea, it’s not close to the top of my priority list.  It’s fun, absolutely.  I love sharing it.  I want to be able to share more.  But right now, there isn’t any more.  I have to write it, which takes brainstorming, plotting, and, well, a lot of time.  Because of our financial situation, I need to use that time on something that has earning potential…even just a smidgen.  Since I’m committed to never charging for Celluloid Files, I can’t logistically support its creation (short of taking donations, which is…possible, I suppose, but feels…weird).

It’s not off the table completely – in fact, it’s hanging out with the salt and pepper and sugar packets as a staple of possibilities.  But it is on hold until I get a paying story finished.

Sorry, guys. 😦